How did you feel on your first day?
After the birth I felt invincible. I couldn’t believe what I had just done. I thought my body was amazing and I was pretty much a rock star. I felt huge amounts of love for my baby too but I wasn’t expecting to feel so powerful in myself. Then later when I was alone with him for the first time I started to feel more daunted and a bit overwhelmed.
What advice would you give yourself now?
Every phase that is so difficult and drives you up the wall will pass surprisingly quickly. Try not to sweat it too much. You may think you’ll never get them to sleep / take a bottle /stop screaming at bath time / but almost before you realise it that phase will have passed and they’ll have thought of something else to keep you on your toes.
Also - pick your battles.
What was a favourite moment for you in your 10th Month?
Arriving back from the hospital to our house which just a day before had been a home for two and realising that it was now a home for three. And also, that he wasn’t going anywhere. It sounds ridiculous but It took a while for it to really sink in that this was life now. I can remember a few points in the 10th month where I felt genuinely surprised (and delighted!) that he was still there.
What did you discover about yourself?
That I wouldn’t recognise the fast paced, working full time, email checking version of myself that I’d been just two weeks earlier. And that I wouldn’t miss her! My world got very small and very slow during the first month and I didn’t mind at all. I guess its a way of coping with the round the clock feeding and sleep deprivation. I had a major sense of achievement if all I managed in a day was a trip to the shop at the end of the road.
What was the most helpful thing anyone did for you in your 10th Month?